Monday, August 29, 2005

Sharpton Ahead

Would YOU Pick up this Hitchhiker?

I'm sorry that this weeks funny story of the week features a man on his way from supporting Cindy Sheehan. Famously camera shy Al Sharpton ended up stranded on the side of the road after his driver was arrested for reportedly leading "sheriff's deputies on a nine- mile chase at speeds up to 110 mph."

"That nine-mile chase is news to me," Sharpton told The Associated Press. "All I know is that the police pulled us over because they wanted to talk to the driver about speeding."

Since cameras mounted on Police cars are the norm these days, I certainly hope Al gets hold of the tapes. If guilty, the driver certainly should have been allowed some slow-down time in the local jail. If a Bush loving good ole' boy Sheriff decided he needed to teach Al a lesson in "Democracy Spreading," then he should be stripped of his badge and tarred and feathered as afternoon entertainment at the Venue of Al's Choosing.

Al is quite the character, always up for some publicity or camera time, but I do believe his heart is in the right place. I remember Stuttering John on the Old OLD Howard Stern show catching Al off guard and hitting him with the zinger "Why do you always wear jogging suits when you appear not to jog?" Al good naturedly laughed it off, giving me some faith in the man.

I have a hard time dealing and trusting people who can't take a good joke.

The recent story gets humorous when it is revealed that the car was impounded when the driver was arrested leaving Al on the side of a Texas Highway, presumably hitchhiking to make his flight out of the land that time forgot.

Now I love Al, he amuses me and he seems to believe what he preaches, despite his carnival sideshow like delivery. But I don't know that I would pick the guy up if I saw him on the side of the road. I probably wouldn't believe it was really him, just some insane celebrity look a like. Why insane? You would have to be to look like Al or dress like Al.

But the good news is there is proof of intelligent life in Texas as some citizen did see him and pick him up and deliver him safely to the airport where he made it in time to catch his flight out.

The Moral of this story: A black man should know better than to drive through Texas.

Special thanks to for hosting my photos.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

Permission Slip: Iraq

I'm Uncle Sam /that's who I am

Been hidin' out/in a rock and roll band

Shake the hand that shook the hand

Of P.T. Barnum/and Charlie Chan

wave that flag

killing the terrorists?

Shine your shoes/light your fuse

Can you use/them ol' U.S. Blues?

I'll drink your health/share your wealth

Run your life/steal your wife

wave that flag

killing the terrorists?

Back to back/chicken shack

Son of a gun/better change your act

We're all confused/what's to lose?

You can call this song/the United States Blues

wave that flag

killing the terrorists?

Wave that flag

Wave it wide and high

Summertime done come and gone

My oh My

wave that flag

killing the terrorists?

U.S. Blues

-The Grateful Dead

your loved one

Special thanks to for hosting my photos.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Mulch Preaches About Second Life

When your First Life Sucks, Get a Second Life

I have alluded to Second Life in my profile, but my new friend Clyde posted some questions about it in a comments post. I answered it, but I figured I needed to touch base on it in my blog.

I don't want my blog to exclusively feature Second Life subject matter, as there are many who do this already (including my Girlfriend), and my First Life is the one I have issue with, but i will include a primer for those of you interested but not sold on the concept.

As a disclaimer, if you use my links to Second Life in this blog to sign up, I will get an in game bonus for introducing you and you will be logged in to my property when you first play. In return, I agree to help you get oriented, and give you a load a freebies and tips to help you out. Sound fair?

Most questions about the world of Second Life can be answered on the main site prior to signing up. But there are some questions I am sure you have, so I will answer Clyde's questions as I did where he asked them and if you have any further questions, you may use the comments field to ask. Any future discussion of Second Life in this blog will assume the reader has read this entry.

Clyde Asked:

OK, so boredom finally pushed me today to see what the big fuss was all about over this 'Second Life' cyberworld... The website makes it sound like a pretty interesting game with no limits (except financially). And for US$10 for a basic account, I was actually half considering signing up just for the sake of "checking it out". But then I saw the 'Live Video' feed. Just a fixed camera position next to a water fountain with some ppl chatting. You wanna enlighten me perhaps on what ELSE goes on in Second Life?

What scares me a little I guess is the fact that 'online' money can equal real-world money. Sounds pretty hardcore for an alternate-reality. Do you actually have a job in that game???

The excitement of the live feed is determined by where the camera is placed.

The real money connection is actually a positive. It ties into your question about jobs.

There are no jobs given to you to train experience points, like in other games or mmorpgs. You do not have levels or advance in levels. You cannot win this "game." You do get an in game stipend depending on your membership levels, but your creativity and marketing will be what makes you real world cash.

The developers do not consider it a game at all (although there are games within the game). Detractors call it a glorified chat room. It can be a strictly social experience if that is what you want.

you can be a consumer or producer. producing requires real world skills, such as building and 3d modeling (the tools are pretty easy to learn), scripting, animating, texturing, or other similar computer type fields. You an also invest in land (or currency) to sell, but you had better understand the market and be good at sales to do so. You can also create your own supply and demand if you want and are creative enough to do so. You can even trade on a virtual Stock Exchange, but remember, since the in world currency has real market value, you do all of the above at your own risk.

2 notable people in game have made a lot of real world money. From what I hear, the #1 land baroness is on track to make 6 figures USD this year. A game creator created a game within Second Life, and sold it to outside developers for a reported 5 figure price tag. It is called Tringo.

The reasons I play are as follow in no particular order

    1) 98% of the content is user created, so you have many different inspirations, not a tunnel vision company line. You can be a person, a dragon, an elf, a vampire, a bdsm master or slave, or a bunny rabbit. If its not there already, you can make it and sell it.
    2) Anything you create it in game, you own the rights to it worldwide. It is YOUR intellectual property, not the game developers.
    3) 18+ only, no bratty kids!
    4) Creative people bask in an interactive environment as this. I have put together a few places I love being at, and like minded people often end up there with me. I have even hired a resident I met for a real world project currently under development. His talent in game convinced me he could handle the job when elance and local contractors failed me.
    5) Huge proportion of women!
    6) You can create things in game that you cannot in real life because of constraints such as time, money, gravity etc.
    7) No censorship. There are very few rules, most deal with interfering with other peoples experience. Hate speech and copyright infringements is about where they draw the line.
    8) Employees can be found in game with the last name Linden. They can help you with in game problems, give you advice or point you in the right direction, or even give you collectible bears named after them. They don't hide behind a customer support ticket.


    1) It can be a money pit, but I own a lot of land and still spend less then 1 real life date per month on it. If you don't have skills or something to sell, you won't be able to buy the toys you want (unless you purchase currency).
    2) Buggy. It's a revolutionary concept in interactiveness started by the guy who created the Real Player technology (he left after 3 years as CEO of REAL to start SL). As such, it is a streaming dynamic game, not a static one. That can lead to problems from time to time that make it seem like a beta. That being said, it really is a small price to pay considering the outlet for pent up creativity.
    3) Non - Creative people tend to get frustrated and leave as they don't feel like contributors.
    4) Fairly steep learning curve. It can take awhile to acquaint yourself with all the options, possibilities, and tools. But the good news is most residents are very kind and friendly and helpful. I have met a few assholes, but the ratio is far lower than any other online game experience i ever had.
    5) You need a pretty good computer to truly enjoy this game. High end graphics and audio put this out of reach for many people with old computers or on board graphics cards. Some settings can be lowered to help, but that dilutes from the experience IMHO.
    6) You MUST have broadband, cable or DSL. Dial up will not work.

There is a free 7 day trial, so no risk (although they do require your credit card for age verification.) If you don't want to join cancel before the 7 days and you won't be charged a thing. But for $10 USD for life, it's not really a bad deal anyway you slice it, even if you are just a tourist there. I have 2 accounts I pay $10 a month for plus land use fees (I own a lot of land)

MY girlfriend and I own and run a Hippy Dance-hall, A Hippy Amusement Park with rides (the Acid Drop, the best roller coaster in Second Life), a drum circle, a cafe in "France" based on the cafe from Amelie, a mansion my darling decorated, and I am now working on a recreation of a 10 in 1 sideshow.

The demographics from what I understand are males 18-25 and females 35-45. Women love socializing and playing "Barbie," dressing themselves up and going out on the town. Guys love building, scripting, and yes, playing army man or space invader. I have a full arsenal of weapons and have a functioning Transformers Skywarp "costume." I keep things in perspective and only shoot people in fake worlds, unlike some people.

There is also a heavy element of sex in the game. There are PG and mature regions, so it won't be in your face if you don't like it. I could care less preferring the real thing, but I will admit to owning a few sexual gadgets because they are kinda fun, although hardly fulfilling. BDSMer's really have taken to this game. I don't understand it, but to each his own.

You can check out my girlfriends blog at for her perspective. She is a writer and teacher in real life, and is trying to use the game as a teaching tool.

Give it a shot and give me a holler, I have tons of freebies, help advice, and can show you around a bit.

And if someone helps you out (like me), rate them in return. It is polite and most will happily rate you back (like me).

My in world name is Mulch Ennui. Look me up and tell me if I influenced you to join. Also, please use my name and links to tell them I referred you because I will get an in game bonus. I would appreciate it =)

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Who is Mulch Maker?

Well, my claws have come out. Make an ass of yourself in print, and you risk Mulch Maker coming out and, well, making mulch out of you. I wanted to come out soft, so I did, but I am opinionated, egotistical, provocative, and interactive.

Again, yes I have an ego. Yes I think I am always right. But I do have a strong logic circuit, and I can and do listen to reason.

Blatant disregard of truth, facts, logic, honesty, and reality set me off. That is a pretty good reason why I hate the Bush administration; they disregard all of the above.

Anyway, if somehow you find yourself reading my work, and wonder why, here are but 2 articles where I go on the offensive strongly against things that seem to me in every logic, karmic, and realistic fiber of my beings to be wrong. Neither are my best work, but, they show you what you are dealing with if you lie or deny truth.

Both were pointed out to me by friends, so I took a look and was outraged enough by what I saw to take a stand. The first one involves Cindy Sheehan and what a friend pointed out was an indecent attack on a grieving mother in another blog (which ended with Clyde influencing me into starting my own blog, to what avail I know not at this time), the second a consumer advocate friend of mind sent me to a site where the corporate activists were beating up on consumers taken advantage of and steamrolled by the corporate machine. In both cases, I hit back hard and deadly, putting all forms of diplomacy by the wayside.

OK, some of that stuff where I point out the Allstate shills IS pretty good material. It astounds me that some of them continue to deny they work for Allstate in spite of the overwhelming evidence, but then again, I guess I would lie too if I cared that much about money and someone named Mulch Maker pointed out and proved that I was a liar and corporate plant, thereby killing my meal ticket.

Burying this comment is probably the wrong place for this, but I saw a pretty major discrepancy between the names of places where people on the opposing side of the Sheehan debate have chosen to come together, Camp Casey and Fort Qualls, according to


    1. A place where tents, huts, or other temporary shelters are set up, as by soldiers, nomads, or travelers.

    2. A cabin or shelter or group of such buildings: gathered branches and grasses for a makeshift camp; had a fishing camp in Vermont.

    3. The people using such shelters: a howl that awakened the whole camp.

    1. A place in the country that offers simple group accommodations and organized recreation or instruction, as for vacationing children: a girls' summer camp; a tennis

    2. Sports. A place where athletes engage in intensive training, especially preseason training.

    3. The people attending the programs at such a place.

  1. Military service; army life.

  2. A group of people who think alike or share a cause; side: The council members disagreed, falling into liberal and conservative camps.

v. camped, camp·ing, camps

v. intr.
  1. To make or set up a camp.

  2. To live in or as if in a camp; settle: We camped in the apartment until the furniture arrived.

v. tr.
To shelter or lodge in a camp; encamp: They camped themselves by a river.


    1. The science of fortifying.

    2. The act or process of fortifying.

  1. Something that serves to fortify, especially military works erected to fortify a position or place.

  2. n 1: a fortified military post where troops are stationed [syn: garrison] 2: a fortified defensive structure [syn: fortress] v 1: gather in, or as if in, a fort, as for protection or defense [syn: fort up] 2: enclose by or as if by a fortification [syn: fortify] 3: station (troops) in a fort

It just seems one name is blatant military, which implies war, and one isn't. When I go camping, there is no military or warlike connotation. If I set up a fort, well...

Just seems to point out a fundamental difference in the mentality of the 2 sides.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

A Doctor is Not a Doctor Unless he Strokes Your Ego

Doctor Being Investigated by Attorney General For Trying to Help Woman Live Longer

So this doctor gives this woman sound advice, and she attacks him. Her pride is more important than science and medicine? This doctor should ignore his hippocratic oath so she can continue to live her illusion?

Let's hope the intelligent people of New Hampshire don't allow this to go on too long. I hope this woman's fat ass is shown on every channel, so everyone can look at her and say "Honestly, you could stand to lose a few pounds."

I often draw a relation to the fat bloated gluttonous excess of the "American Way of Life" and why other countries hate us.

Look at it this way, if your bigger, older brother grabs all the food and eats it every night from the dinner table before you or your younger, less powerful siblings get any food, you would be mad too. The obesity is just a symptom of a greater problem here, as is our need for more war and the hatred the rest of the world feels for us.

In a nod to my theory on the fat bloated wasteful excess of the "American" way of life, This Study shows the correlation between the waistlines of red states (with Michigan and Colorado being the obvious discrepancy).

Not surprising that you gluttons in the "Bible Belt" just want to invade anyone whose way of life may cause your portions to be smaller. Way to go fat asses! Vote for another war monger and send more of your kids as cannon fodder. Go against the bible you are continuously thumping and kill.

Ever wonder why sideshows went extinct? Probably because the fat ladies didn't look all that different from the spectators.

Pat Robertson is a Terrorist

Assassination Now Being Taught as Christian Doctrine; Muslim Fundamentalists not Alone (just not as well armed)

Pat Roberston has illustrated the consequences of the "with us or against" us policy of the current religious fanatic administration by suggesting that the U.S violate policy and assassinate Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez on the 700 Club, his TV show on the Christian Broadcasting Network. “If he thinks we're trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it,” taught Robertson, not bothering to back any of it up with scripture.

Yeah I said Christian Broadcasting Network. For those of you who don't know, Christianity is a religion founded on the teachings of Jesus Christ, a man who taught peace and forgiveness. Does anyone else notice the hypocrisy yet?

So in a nod to the Islamic teachers who teach "Kill the Infidels," Robertson is advocating killing those who disagree with him. How nice.

See, Chavez was elected by the people of Venezuela and stands to be elected once again. Oddly enough, this doesn't seem to qualify as democracy (since, you know, they have oil and are leveraging it against us).

An unpopular coup was organized against Chavez in April 2002, the elected leader, and by most speculation it was organized by the CIA. One wonders how long until the WMD argument is used against Chavez to have our boys "spread freedom" in yet another potential invasion. I believe that is how we historically leverage the sheep in public opinion into invading an oil rich, sovereign nation.

"(Assassination is) a whole lot cheaper than starting a war. And I don't think any oil shipments will stop." Robertson followed, certainly slipping on the true intent of his comments. The White House immediately called a press conference to denounce Robertson's Faux Pas in the lightest possible terms.

"He's a private citizen. Private citizens say all kinds of things all the time." said Donald "I can't be prosecuted for War Crimes" Rumsfeld.

Odd, if Robertson is just a private citizen, why does the U.S. Government call a press conference about it? I say nutty things all the time but Rumsfeld has never taken an official position on anything I have ever said. Robertson must have let some kind of cat out of a bag.

"Without question this is a dangerous enemy to our south, controlling a huge pool of oil that could hurt us very badly," Mr. Robertson said to remove all doubt on his perspective on Christianity and US foreign policy. Can anyone point me to the exact bible verse that says that it is OK to kill or invade as long as it is for oil?

Friday, August 19, 2005

1984 Jacko Attacko

Supreme Court Nominee Not a Fan of the "Androgynous Mono-Gloved" Jackson

In a surprise twist, ultra conservative Supreme Court nominee John Roberts has had his suspicions about Michael Jackson for over 20 years. OK, while being suspicious of Michael Jackson isn't really a surprise for anyone, what IS surprising is the sense of humor the rabid tongued Roberts possesses. He is well suited and worthy to blog as his poison pen pretty much marked Jackson a freak in a rather amusing way.

Said Roberts of JAckson: "If one wants the youth of America and the world sashaying around in garish sequined costumes, hair dripping with pomade, body shot full of female hormones to prevent voice change, mono-gloved, well, then, I suppose 'Michael,' as he is affectionately known in the trade, is in fact a good example. Quite apart from the problem of appearing to endorse Jackson's androgynous life style, a Presidential award would be perceived as a shallow effort by the President to share in the constant publicity surrounding Jackson. . . . The whole episode would, in my view, be demeaning to the President."

Ever the showman, Reagan apparently disregarded the warning and had a summit with the man of 1,000 noses and skin tones. No word on whether Ronnie or Nancy spent any nights at Neverland.

"Roberts particularly objected to award wording that described Jackson as an 'outstanding example' for American youth." Wait, you're telling me he was even aware that Michael shouldn't be left alone with kids? Very ahead of his time is Roberts, very perceptive. Maybe I shouldn't hold the fact Bush brought him in make me dislike him. Well, then of course is his unfunny feelings on Homemakers that kinda shows his unapologetic misogyny, reducing his forethought on Jackson to the equivalent of caveman accidentally discovering fire.

Well, to look on the bright side, with Clarence "Pubic Hair on my Coke" "Long Dong Silver" Thomas and John "Archie Bunker" Roberts on the same court, things may get very entertaining.

Special thanks to for hosting my photos.

911 on the 420

Who Was He Sending this Too?

No one likes seeing a pot head busted, but even if the case was to be made that this guy was a pretty big idiot for taking the pictures in the first place, this doesn't seem likely to hold up in court.

If I was a lawyer, I think it would seem like a motion for suppression would be a no brainer. The data on the phone (in the container) was private property, and the police searched private property without the owners permission. Not only that, proving the photos were of this mans property to get the warrant seems like a pretty, erm, abstract way of invading someones home.

And what if his phone was stolen? What if the thieves were taking photos of their garden? It just doesn't seem to evidence that could be used to get a warrant.

But then again this is Florida, the mother of all logic black holes. It wouldn't really surprise me if they subpoenaed his phone records and searched everyone he called. Any lawyers out there have an opinion?

Not So Ambiguous

To the Batpole

So DC comics is homophobic? This has got to be the funniest story of the day. Seriously, what's the big deal? I don't think anyone would think this is an official DC comics release. It's in WATERCOLORS for Christ sake. Will my finger-painted transsexual Wonder Woman refrigerator art be next?

As if this was the first time the dynamic duo has been the subject of this type of speculation. Bruce Wayne (nothing gay about the name Bruce) was the richest guy in town, yet he spent all his time with his "youthful ward" DICK.

And I know almost all superhero's wear there marble bag underwear outside of their clothes, but Robin took it a step further by wearing pantie hose under his underwear.

I wonder if there would have been this type of controversy if he wasn't selling them, just displaying them. It seems like the Grey Album controversy all over again.

I guess what makes this newsworthy is that they are gay in these artistic renderings. It wouldn't get the media coverage if it wasn't controversial. As the homosexual communities continue to celebrate their Massachusetts Victory, and fight the fight in other states, the prominence of stories like this prove that they are still considered second class citizens; controversial if you will. If Batman and Robin are gay, well, then they must keep their secret identities hidden and "don't ask, don't tell;" keep their perversions safely tucked into the backdoor of the Batcave.

BTW, does anyone know where I can get some "art" that features Catwoman and Batgirl making out?

Special thanks to for hosting my photos.

Mixed Ticket

Could Hillary do What Kerry Couldn't

I'm not talking about winning the presidency, I'm talking about a bipartisan ticket with John McCain. This article deals with the environment, but let's face it, this president has declared war against the environment, and him retreating from this war on Mother Nature is about as likely as him pulling out of Iraq or admitting that nobody has any idea the REAL reason why we are even there. (pretty soon the list of things, people, places, and ideas Bush II has started wars with will be larger than the list of what he hasn't started wars with) So I will avoid the temptation to stress on environmental issues at this point.

But think about it. Hillary has her eye set on the big house, but some of my friends, and myself to some degree, don't believe she is ready for that position yet (nor is the public at large ready for a female executive). She has recently been swimming into moderate territory, so it seems very natural for her to have encountered John McCain there. McCain is as ready as anyone to launch his bid for the big chair, a few years as vice president could accustom Hillary, or more likely the public, of her in official power.

So what would happen if John McCain ran for president and asked Hillary to be vice? It isn't such an out there idea anymore considering THIS. (as an aside, the lead Kerry held over Bush at the time that story was written is amazing considering how the election turned out. What did Bush do so right or what did Kerry do so wrong to end up the way it did? Even the predicted Kerry Edwards ticket was destroying Bush at this time. It must just be a case of "My 527's can beat your 527's.")

But I can see a whole new frontier in elections with a McCain/Clinton ticket. Which party would finance the campaign? Which party would endorse the campaign? Who would the conservative talk show hosts talk shit about? What would happen at the convention? What would our ballot look like?

There are way more questions than answers, but the novelty alone would be worth supporting the formation of the "Dream Team" ticket. I tend not to daydream about this too much this early in the game, because they both have tremendous egos, so it would be hard to imagine either of them swallowing the bitter pill of vice presidency if either of these don't get their parties nomination.

But if it did happen, with McCain and Hillary on the same ticket, the line would finally be completely blurred between the mechanism that controls the highest office. Maybe at that point, a chance for a legitimate 3rd, 4th or maybe even more parties can enter our system. It is truly a win-win situation for everyone.

3 out of 9

Cat uses up 30% of its 9 Lives in One Move

According to reports, this cat climbed a power pole trying to get at a birds nest, was shocked, burst into flames, fell 40 feet to the ground, set a small fire outside a fire station, and survived. And you thought you were having a bad day.

The Human Body

Art, Science, or Freakshow?

Much has been made of the legal jurisdiction and the ethics of this display, but I admit I would be interested in seeing this exhibit. Our bodies are truly amazing machines, and this type of attraction strips away the grotesque and grizzly aspect of the human body and shows the elements involved in function. The only way to see this type of information prior to displays like this was in a very bloody way.

Ethically, I don't see how you could outlaw the display of human bodies. I am certain there are some that disagree. The questionable origin of the bodies seems to be the main sticking point here for serious disagreement, but other than that, what do you think about displaying the human body in such a way at a museum? Who you have a problem donating your own body to the cause?

My own mother doesn't want an open coffin, a funeral, or even a burial plot when she dies. She has told me to donate her body to science. But I wonder how she would feel if the scientists I donated her body to did this to her. I would ask her, but she gets freaked about about talk of death anyway, so I'll post it here and see what comes of it.

Special thanks to for hosting my photos.

Stress Test

Another Email I most recently got was from my aunt. The email claims these images are part of a stress test. Aside from the cool visual hallucinations they produce (and I happen to Love hallucinations), these are interesting in another way.

According to the email she sent me, the more stressed you are, the faster the images appears to move. I am a certified hypnotherapist (I don't practice, but as a student of communication on multiple levels, NLP and Ericksonian hypnosis fascinates me), perhaps that is why I am able to slow the movement to a stop. I don't know how accurate this is a stress test or even the origin of these images, but it's fun stuff nonetheless, so I thought I would share.

So enjoy the pix and if you have a second, comment on how the images appear to you and whether or not you can control the speed. And, remember, mellow.

Special thanks to for hosting my photos.

If you are Going to Cheat, Be a Swinger and do it WITH Your Partner

Well, here goes Mulch's 1st Blog, so let's start out with some humor.

Those of you who know me in real life know that I am not monogamous, what some people refer to as a swinger.

I personally don't like that word as it gives the image you see of "bob" on the left, but still, the human mind is too complex to commit your body with just one person for the rest of your life. And since you can love more then one person simultaneously, being faithful doesn't really have anything to do with what you do between the sheets. I am not really going to justify my thought patterns here, maybe another blog down the line, but not here

I just got an email from an Ex Girlfriend who I WAS monogamous with, and she sent a few pictures in an email entitled "Bad Break Ups." that show why you should only be polyamourous if your partner knows about it BEFOREHAND.

The ironic part of her Bad Breakups letter is she is the only girlfriend to ever take revenge on me by attacking my property (she put a cigarette out on my car). I was concerned before I opened the letter that it had to do with me. Thankfully it does not.

So enough about me, here's the reasons you might wanna reconsider swapping fluids with anyone other then the person you promised to stay faithful to.

Special thanks to for hosting my photos.


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